Weird things you perhaps would never know.
Butterflies taste with their feet.
A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.
In 10 minutes, a hurricane releases more energy than all the world’s nuclear weapons combined.
On average, 100 people choke on ballpoint pens every year.
Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.
Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 yearsor older.
It’s possible to lead a cow upstairs…but not downstairs.
Women blink nearly twice as much as men.
The Main Library at Indiana University sinks over an inch every year because when it was built, engineers failed to consider the weight of all the books that would occupy the building.
A snail can sleep for three years.
Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches.
Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.
The electric chair was invented by a dentist.
All polar bears are left handed.
An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.
“Go.” Is the shortest complete sentence in English?
A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.
The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.
Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.
‘Stewardesses’ is the longest word typed with only the left hand.
The sentence, ‘The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog’ uses every letter in the English language.
Every time you lick a stamp, you’re consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.
The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
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Jewel: Some people come into our lives and quickly go leaving bruises and scars on our hearts. Some stay awhile and leave gentle footprints of love and respect on our hearts and souls and we are never, ever the same.
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My nephew informed me the other day that McDonalds is planning to offer a new hamburger made entirely of cows’ lips. It’s going to be called the McJagger.
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One of our readers sent us the following Appalachian Quick Reference Guide:
Myep-ya…May I help you?
Mear-mint…Come here a minute.
Rat-chere…Right here (or thar).
Y’all…you all.
All-y’all…plural of y’all.
Purt-n-nir…pretty near.
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Clarification of corporate lingo: Competitive salary: We remain competitive by paying less than our competitors.
Join our fast-paced company: We have no time to train you.
Casual workplace atmosphere: We don’t pay enough to expect that you’ll dress up; well, a couple of the reallydaring guys wear earrings.
Must be deadline oriented: You’ll be six months behind schedule on your first day of work here.
Some overtime required: Some time each night and some time each weekend.
Duties will vary: Anyone in the office can boss you around.
Must have an eye for detail: We have no quality control.
Career-minded: Female applicants must be childless (and remain that way).
Apply in person: If you’re old, fat, or ugly, you’ll be told the position has already been filled.
Seeking candidates with a wide variety of experience: You’ll need to replace three people who just left.
Problem-solving skills a must: You’re walking into a company in perpetual chaos.
Requires team leadership skills: You’ll have the responsibilities of a manager, without the pay or respect.
Good communication skills: Management communicates, you listen, figure out what they want and do it.
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Top ten oxymorons:
1. MICROSOFT WORKS (!!)
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The four stages of life:
1. You believe in Santa Claus.
2. You don’t believe in Santa Claus.
3. You are Santa Claus.
4. You look like Santa Claus.
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Great truths about life that adults have learned:
1. Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree.
2. Wrinkles don’t hurt.
3. Families are like fudge…mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4. Today’s mighty oak is just yesterday’s nut that held its ground.
5. Laughing is good exercise. It’s like jogging on the inside.
6. Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
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Top o’ the morning!